Freedom and Responsibility

Freedom and Responsibility

To be free is to take responsibility for your own happiness.

Today we tend to delegate to others choices we alone are responsible for. We delegate our children’s and our own education to school, we delegate our emotions to a psychologist, we delegate our happiness to someone else’s love for us, we delegate our reason to politicians and our culture to experts.

When we delegate we think we are getting rid of the responsibility. Once you send your son to school, it’s not your fault any more if he doesn’t learn, once someone loves you it’s not on you any more to remember to love yourself, once an expert declares something, you don’t have to interrogate yourself so much about it any more, and it’s not on you if the expert, and you with him, turns out to be wrong.

Delegating makes us feel like the weight of responsibility is not pushing down on our shoulders any more.

But that is just a wrong impression. Delegation doesn’t take away the responsibility, it just makes us feel justified for ignoring it.

When we delegate our education or our happiness to someone else, we are responsible not only for the choice to delegate, but also for every choice that other person makes for us.

Responsibility is always on us, we can decide to leave it to someone else to influence it or we can own it. But it’s there, it makes us responsible for everything that happens to us.

Once we own it, accept it, we are free. Then there are no sacrifices and no mistakes, there are no faults of others: everything is a choice, and everything is our choice.

Being free is not just rainbows and joy, freedom is a difficult thing to live with. Freedom means that if you’re unhappy it’s on you and you alone. Happiness is your own responsibility and shouldn’t depend on anyone else. Success is your own responsibility and shouldn’t depend on anything else. Life is your own, and no one can lead yours but you.

That’s not an easy concept.

People deny it, but freedom is a “hard” choice to make, it takes courage and determination, it takes strength and passion. It’s so much easier to keep delegating, so very less complicated to just follow the mass and standardise. Doing what you’re told or expected to do is easy, deciding what to do from scratch is not.

 

Once you are free and responsible for your life, you learn there are no failures, only lessons, and there are no sacrifices, only choices, and there are no duties, only passions, and there are no mistakes, only life.

Not because freedom is easy, but because a free life is happy even in the darkest and most difficult moments.

The Danish Girl: A ballet of freedom

 The Danish Girl brings on screen the real story of one of the first women to undergo the gender reassignment surgery.

Lili is a beautiful woman trapped in a male body, her strenght shows as the one of a butterfly breaking the cocoon to bring colours in the world. Her strenght is elegant and shy at times, but fierce and certain.

The main actor gifts us with a breathtaking performance, he dances in Lili’s clothes offering a very good representation of transgender people.

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Quotes Wall: Leaves of grass by Walt Whitman


 

Thou reader throbbest life and pride and love the same as I,
Therefore for thee the following chants.

 

I celebrate myself, and sing myself,
And what I assume you shall assume,
For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you.

 

Stranger, if you passing meet me and desire to speak to me,
why should you not speak to me?
And why should I not speak to you?

 

The smallest sprout shows there is really no death,
And if ever there was it led forward life, and does not
wait at the end to arrest it,
And ceas’d the moment life appear’d.

All goes onward and outward, nothing collapses,
And to die is different from what any one supposed, and
luckier.

 

I do not press my fingers across my mouth

 

I believe a leaf of grass is no less than the journey-work
of the stars

 

My faith is the greatest of faiths and the least of faiths,
Enclosing worship ancient and modern and all between
ancient and modern,
Believing I shall come again upon the earth after five
thousand years…

 

Each one who passes is consider’d, each who stops is
consider’d, not a single one can it fail.

 

I do not know it – it is without name – it is a word unsaid

[…]

It is not chaos or death – it is form, union, plan – it is
eternal life – it is Happiness.

 

The love of the body of a man or woman balks account,
the body itself balks account,
That of the male is perfect, and that of the female is
perfect.

 

Each belongs here or anywhere just as much as the
well-off, just as much as you,
Each has his or her place in the procession.

 

(What is this that frees me so in storms?
What do my shouts amid lightnings and raging winds mean?) 

 

– Quotes from “Leaves of grass by Walt Whitman